"To the dull mind nature is leaden. To the illumined mind the whole world burns and sparks with light."
Emerson
There are some spring days that seem...radiant. The glow that is more than light, it's a feel to the air, a scent. A peace that seems unrelated to anything going on in your life. Like Mother Earth is saying, "I love you. All is well. Don't worry ".
When this radiance over comes me on occasion, out of a golden blue sky, the world goes away for a time and I'm enveloped in this peace, a stillness that is pregnant with potential. And a springing up of joy to meet it.
I love these moments!
They give me strength to be the kind of person I want to be. Be like Mother Earth, "I love you. All is well. Don't worry".
And somehow I know this is true, but at the same time I see there are troubles in the world, people who are hungry, afraid, suffering from all kinds of things, sometimes through no fault of their own, or because of their own poor choices. No matter, when we hurt and suffer, whether from our own actions or those of another, it doesn't make the pain less.
The thing is... We all want the same things out of life. We want to be happy and we don't want to suffer. We all need the same thing. Enough food for the day, shelter, safety. Loving people around us.
I don't remember who said it, "You must be the change you wish to see happen in the world."
When we see the Light, and understand that we are all one, there can be no enemy.
My husband, Duncan, says I'm like an eight year old girl, with a woman wrapped around her. He is not implying that I am naive, although I've been accused of that, but he is saying, I have the spirit of a child, curiosity, faith, trust, belief in people. He says I'm an incorrigible optimist.
I can't help it.
Spring gets in my bones and I want to dance.
So what do we do with all these difficult feelings and experiences that seem counter to the message of spring, the song in the heart of Mother Earth? How do we live with the reality that seems to be in our face everyday?
Well, that is the personal struggle we each face. No one else can give you your answer. And yet we can support each other on our search.
Love is a verb. That mean it has hands and feet, ears to listen with and a mouth to bless.
If you think this is getting all to sappy sweet, just think of the work ahead of us in a changing world. Me and mine has not worked all that well, maybe it is time to think of We and Us instead. And if you think that is sappy sweet, it's just plain hard work we're looking at, but could have huge dividends.
I had a dream not long ago, where I was walking in a beautiful woods. I heard a woman crying. It was a heart broken weeping. I went looking for her. When I found her, I knew she was Mother Earth. I ask, "Why are you weeping?" She said, "I am drowning in human flesh and misery".
I don't know exactly what that might mean, except the feeling I have that Love weeps for the suffering happening around the world.
Does the earth feel? Is there an awareness there. Who can say for certain? But it is a true fact that there is pain and fear out there. We all feel it. It's part of the human condition. The question is can we change it? Even a little more Light would be good.
We need spring, and the message, "You are loved! Somehow all will be well! Don't worry!".
Now, get out there and do something good for someone.
4.26.2009
4.25.2009
SPRING IS IN THE AIR
"All know that the drop merges into the ocean but few know that the ocean merges into the drop."
Kabir
Anyway, that's what the birds are saying.
I love this time of year. Duncan and I began dating in the spring and married in the fall. They have always been our favorite times of the years.
Never to hot or to cold.
As I was checking in with some of my favorite blog sights, and because it's spring, I just have to mention the #1 on my list.
Red and the Peanut
The reason I love this blog is the obvious joy in what Kelly is doing. And the pictures. It is like an educational visit every time I go there. I'm not a bird watcher, per say, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate what Kelly is showing. I'm a natural nature watcher.
It's like I get to go on her bird watches with her. I can hear the sounds of nature and feel the human noise sluff away into a silence that hears the voice of nature alone.
I'm always so amazed at the talents and interests of the people at these places I go to in my blog time. When I read their posts, I always wish I could sit down with them and just talk. Find out what lead them to the loves in their lives, what drives their passions, and where do they think they get the welling up of their creativity. Did they have to work at it or was it just ...there?
Thank you Kelly for the joy you share with every post.
Kabir
Anyway, that's what the birds are saying.
I love this time of year. Duncan and I began dating in the spring and married in the fall. They have always been our favorite times of the years.
Never to hot or to cold.
As I was checking in with some of my favorite blog sights, and because it's spring, I just have to mention the #1 on my list.
Red and the Peanut
The reason I love this blog is the obvious joy in what Kelly is doing. And the pictures. It is like an educational visit every time I go there. I'm not a bird watcher, per say, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate what Kelly is showing. I'm a natural nature watcher.
It's like I get to go on her bird watches with her. I can hear the sounds of nature and feel the human noise sluff away into a silence that hears the voice of nature alone.
I'm always so amazed at the talents and interests of the people at these places I go to in my blog time. When I read their posts, I always wish I could sit down with them and just talk. Find out what lead them to the loves in their lives, what drives their passions, and where do they think they get the welling up of their creativity. Did they have to work at it or was it just ...there?
Thank you Kelly for the joy you share with every post.
4.22.2009
DEEP PEACE
Deep peace of the
running wave to you.
Deep peace of the
flowing air to you.
Deep peace of the
gentle night to you.
Moon and stars pour
their healing light on you.
Deep peace of the
Light of the World to you.
-A Gaelic Blessing-
Last night I heard of the death of a friend of mine. He and his wife attend the same faith community as me. About eight months ago they learned he had cancer.
It has been a long eight months. And not long enough.
There are no words to express my feelings right now. The loss of his presence, for his wife, their children, and grandchildren, and our group, is simply to sharp to form words on that edge.
You always wonder, how will the family adjust. I don't doubt they will though. The love that is in the universe will support them. And so will we.
My sister in law, is in the hospital today, with problems due to cancer. We are waiting for the results of some tests and the sibs are all flying in, the oldest brother, and two younger sisters. Duncan and I went to meet with her two best friends at the hospital last night. We all talked about what we can do.
The Dr. said he couldn't say how long. It could be soon, or it could be two years.
My prayer for us all right now is Deep Peace, that peace that knows and swallows up sorrow and loss, and fear of loss.
4.09.2009
ON THE ROAD
The shortest way to Good Health is the Natural Route.
By Dr. R. A. Riggs
I found this quoit in a small blue book, publication date 1940. "Gold Nuggets of Health" abundant health, natures gift.
Thinking a lot about this sort of thing right now as yesterday was my first day back to work after four day at home. The first two I slept most of the time, the third day I had to drop my store rent off. And the fourth I actually had to do some errands. By the time I got home I was ready for my comfies, but then I remembered the Readers Group that meets at the store the first Tuesday of the the month and knew I'd have to go open up for them, but I just gave them the key to lock up and came home.
Looking at this little blue book, thinking about all the advances in medicine and health since 1940, 68 years ago.
Right now, when you tell someone you've been sick, it's, "Oh, Yeah, I had that...." "Just got over it..." "Yeah, a whole bunch of people at school are out with it..."
You get the picture. It sounds like everyone in town has been touched by it. If not them, in their home with the children.
We sure don't like to get the flu these days anymore than any other age in time, but for the most part it is not killing us off by the thousands like it used to do.
We can all be thankful for that.
I know the medications may help us recover more quickly, but I've got to say, some of the side effects of the over the counter medicines are about as bad as the flu. I debate with myself every time I take them, "do I really want to take this stuff?"
We just had our spring break a couple of weeks ago and we figured, that this could have been an out of town bug.
Nothing like a little dose of illness to humble you and remind you we all come from the same weak flesh.
That no one is above the forces of nature we are all a part of.
That life is precious.
And good health is not to be taken for granted but lived with thankfulness.
By Dr. R. A. Riggs
I found this quoit in a small blue book, publication date 1940. "Gold Nuggets of Health" abundant health, natures gift.
Thinking a lot about this sort of thing right now as yesterday was my first day back to work after four day at home. The first two I slept most of the time, the third day I had to drop my store rent off. And the fourth I actually had to do some errands. By the time I got home I was ready for my comfies, but then I remembered the Readers Group that meets at the store the first Tuesday of the the month and knew I'd have to go open up for them, but I just gave them the key to lock up and came home.
Looking at this little blue book, thinking about all the advances in medicine and health since 1940, 68 years ago.
Right now, when you tell someone you've been sick, it's, "Oh, Yeah, I had that...." "Just got over it..." "Yeah, a whole bunch of people at school are out with it..."
You get the picture. It sounds like everyone in town has been touched by it. If not them, in their home with the children.
We sure don't like to get the flu these days anymore than any other age in time, but for the most part it is not killing us off by the thousands like it used to do.
We can all be thankful for that.
I know the medications may help us recover more quickly, but I've got to say, some of the side effects of the over the counter medicines are about as bad as the flu. I debate with myself every time I take them, "do I really want to take this stuff?"
We just had our spring break a couple of weeks ago and we figured, that this could have been an out of town bug.
Nothing like a little dose of illness to humble you and remind you we all come from the same weak flesh.
That no one is above the forces of nature we are all a part of.
That life is precious.
And good health is not to be taken for granted but lived with thankfulness.
4.06.2009
I CAN HARDLY THINK
I'm still sick, and have been home for three days with this. No energy yet. Don't eat much. Upset stomach.
I know it's going around, but I don't usually end up with bugs. We've worked with the public for so long we are usually well exposed to everything though.
I'm going back to bed.
I think Utah recommend chicken soup when she was sick. I think I'll go get some.
Can't believe Duncan can still be working through this.
I know it's going around, but I don't usually end up with bugs. We've worked with the public for so long we are usually well exposed to everything though.
I'm going back to bed.
I think Utah recommend chicken soup when she was sick. I think I'll go get some.
Can't believe Duncan can still be working through this.
3.31.2009
EIGHT YEARS AGO TODAY
"Birth is not one act; it is a process. The aim of life is to be fully born, though its tragedy is that most of us die before we are thus born. To live is to be born every minute. Death occurs when birth stops."
Erich Fromm
My Mother and I were close. I was the last child at home. My Father had died when I was 14. Mom and I talked about everything. Anything that troubled me, or her, or things that were curious, interesting, different and just every day things.
We shared many interests in common. She was my Mother, but she was also my friend.
When I turned 18, I was ready for my life's adventure to start. Wasn't that what Mom had raised me for? All the other kids had gone off at 18. I didn't think about Mom being alone. She was an active person engaged with life and the community.
I was on my way.
Years later a friend of hers told me she cried for two weeks she missed me so much. I never even knew. She seemed as excited for me to go and try my wings as I was. She never tried to lay the guilt on me to stay at home, she could have, and I might have stayed. But she didn't even hint at the fact that she would be alone. I never once felt compelled to stay. She opened her arms and let me go.
She even let me take her car. (anyway for the first few weeks of moving and finding a job in a town a hundred mile south.)
I think now of that selfless act of love, which exemplifies the way Mother was with each one of us five kids.
When she died, at age 95, and all the kids had gathered in her home, we were sharing memories as we read her wishes. As sad as that gathering was, we also laughed. One of my brother said, "I've always felt a little guilty, because I was her favorite." My other brother said, "wait a minute. I was her favorite." We all laughed at that, because we had all known we were her favorites.
That was the way she made people feel. Special, loved and unique. She had an incredible gift of helping people see the best in themselves. And also areas where you might need some self examination, but without being made to feel like you were bad or of less worth.
When my brother "the favorite" called to tell me she had died, (he had been living at home so she could stay in her home to the last), I felt a flood of gratitude and joy. She had been expressing how tired she was over the last few years of her life and was ready to cross the river, she would say, and now she had.
My oldest sister was there with two of her daughters, visiting Mom. They had had a wonderful time together and on the last full day they were to be there, they were all visiting at the kitchen table and she said she was going to let them finish up with the breakfast dishes while she took a short nap.
She lied down and slept, and didn't wake up.
I've always thought she had a sweet death. It wasn't a struggle, there was no pain, other than the aches and pains of old age. She wasn't afraid.
I think of her often and especially on the 31st of March. As I know my four Sibs will be thinking of her today too.
It was harder for some of us to let her go than others, and yet I felt her presence with me so often that first year after. We all did.
Something happened at work one night shortly after and I sat down at break time and started writing her a letter, I was upset, half way through I realized she was beyond a forwarding address, and I sat there and was comforted by her presences.
Even after eight years I still miss her and think sometimes, "Now, that would have made Mom laugh!" Or, "I wish I could show her that."
I see her in my siblings, and her grandchildren, a turn of phrase, body language, an attitude, we all carry her with us, and today she will be remembered. She lived a full and happy life.
Over the next few days I will be posting poems I wrote for her. On my poetry blog, Sagewind Voices.
Erich Fromm
My Mother and I were close. I was the last child at home. My Father had died when I was 14. Mom and I talked about everything. Anything that troubled me, or her, or things that were curious, interesting, different and just every day things.
We shared many interests in common. She was my Mother, but she was also my friend.
When I turned 18, I was ready for my life's adventure to start. Wasn't that what Mom had raised me for? All the other kids had gone off at 18. I didn't think about Mom being alone. She was an active person engaged with life and the community.
I was on my way.
Years later a friend of hers told me she cried for two weeks she missed me so much. I never even knew. She seemed as excited for me to go and try my wings as I was. She never tried to lay the guilt on me to stay at home, she could have, and I might have stayed. But she didn't even hint at the fact that she would be alone. I never once felt compelled to stay. She opened her arms and let me go.
She even let me take her car. (anyway for the first few weeks of moving and finding a job in a town a hundred mile south.)
I think now of that selfless act of love, which exemplifies the way Mother was with each one of us five kids.
When she died, at age 95, and all the kids had gathered in her home, we were sharing memories as we read her wishes. As sad as that gathering was, we also laughed. One of my brother said, "I've always felt a little guilty, because I was her favorite." My other brother said, "wait a minute. I was her favorite." We all laughed at that, because we had all known we were her favorites.
That was the way she made people feel. Special, loved and unique. She had an incredible gift of helping people see the best in themselves. And also areas where you might need some self examination, but without being made to feel like you were bad or of less worth.
When my brother "the favorite" called to tell me she had died, (he had been living at home so she could stay in her home to the last), I felt a flood of gratitude and joy. She had been expressing how tired she was over the last few years of her life and was ready to cross the river, she would say, and now she had.
My oldest sister was there with two of her daughters, visiting Mom. They had had a wonderful time together and on the last full day they were to be there, they were all visiting at the kitchen table and she said she was going to let them finish up with the breakfast dishes while she took a short nap.
She lied down and slept, and didn't wake up.
I've always thought she had a sweet death. It wasn't a struggle, there was no pain, other than the aches and pains of old age. She wasn't afraid.
I think of her often and especially on the 31st of March. As I know my four Sibs will be thinking of her today too.
It was harder for some of us to let her go than others, and yet I felt her presence with me so often that first year after. We all did.
Something happened at work one night shortly after and I sat down at break time and started writing her a letter, I was upset, half way through I realized she was beyond a forwarding address, and I sat there and was comforted by her presences.
Even after eight years I still miss her and think sometimes, "Now, that would have made Mom laugh!" Or, "I wish I could show her that."
I see her in my siblings, and her grandchildren, a turn of phrase, body language, an attitude, we all carry her with us, and today she will be remembered. She lived a full and happy life.
Over the next few days I will be posting poems I wrote for her. On my poetry blog, Sagewind Voices.
3.26.2009
SPRING BREAK
"But it's always interesting when one doesn't see," she added, "If you don't see what a thing means, you must be looking at it wrong way around."
Agatha Christie
English Mystery Writer
There were 89 customers who came through my door yesterday, plus really, as I lost count a few times. My record high count is 112. I average 55 to 65 per day, most months . For one person clerking the store that's a lot of people, and a lot of books coming in and going out.
This picture is from my intake table, where I clean, price and put books away.
I like what I do, but there are times I can feel overwhelmed. Yesterday was one of those times, I came home really tired.
Sometimes I think I should hirer a person a couple of hours a day just to put books away, so I wouldn't have to stay after work, or come in on Sunday afternoons, but then I get worried about making that kind of commitment to anyone.
I dislike with a passion firing people if it doesn't work out. If they can't alphabetize, (everyone says they can - I need to devise a test) or figure out how to move books up and down the shelves to make more room, even after being shown over and over. Or are so slow they can't get a simple small job done in an allotted time.
There are more books in the world than you can imagine. I know because I've got at least 70 thousand of them in my store.
These are the intake shelves where I put the books after I clean them. Full, and over flowing. Blessings of every kind. Hours of adventure, mystery, romance, for you to curl up with in your favorite chair.
This is the doorway into my storeroom. 100 sq. ft. and it's full too.
It's looking sunny and clear out there this morning. Aw, blue skies, and another beautiful day.
Books will be on some one's To Do List.
I'll be there.
Agatha Christie
English Mystery Writer
There were 89 customers who came through my door yesterday, plus really, as I lost count a few times. My record high count is 112. I average 55 to 65 per day, most months . For one person clerking the store that's a lot of people, and a lot of books coming in and going out.
This picture is from my intake table, where I clean, price and put books away.
I like what I do, but there are times I can feel overwhelmed. Yesterday was one of those times, I came home really tired.
Sometimes I think I should hirer a person a couple of hours a day just to put books away, so I wouldn't have to stay after work, or come in on Sunday afternoons, but then I get worried about making that kind of commitment to anyone.
I dislike with a passion firing people if it doesn't work out. If they can't alphabetize, (everyone says they can - I need to devise a test) or figure out how to move books up and down the shelves to make more room, even after being shown over and over. Or are so slow they can't get a simple small job done in an allotted time.
There are more books in the world than you can imagine. I know because I've got at least 70 thousand of them in my store.
These are the intake shelves where I put the books after I clean them. Full, and over flowing. Blessings of every kind. Hours of adventure, mystery, romance, for you to curl up with in your favorite chair.
This is the doorway into my storeroom. 100 sq. ft. and it's full too.
It's looking sunny and clear out there this morning. Aw, blue skies, and another beautiful day.
Books will be on some one's To Do List.
I'll be there.
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